Cristina left me. by Miguel

                            Dear Cristina,

One month ago you kicked me out of yuor life. I hate you so much because of this, I've tried to kill your whole family, but I thought about it twice and I decided not to kill them, because I was sent to jail after trying to burn your parents' home. But I decided it was not worth it. I'm so much better, I even left the asylum. My heart is still broken, maybe it's because of the stroke I had last week, but I'm sure that I still love you, that's why I tried to kill myself this morning, but someone "rescued" me and took me off the balcony. But this evening I met a girl, so f*** you.

                             Yours truly,
                             The one who has kidnapped your cat